Poetry of Dying
Pour the ocean into a teacup.
Express in words the meaning of your life.
Why was I born?
What did I come to learn?
When I die…what endures?
Where is I…?
Who sees…?
Belief and doubt is one, not two.
Knowing blooms in not-knowing.
Living and dying unfold in mystery.
I am afraid… and dying to live.
As suffering surrenders,
The soul opens and swallows the stars.
Follow the breath till the end.
Rest there…, in the silence,
Until the cool breeze finds your
true face.
© doshin mj nelson
2005
Zazen
Lips parched, I
Gaze into cloudless sky
Praying for rain
Pounding a stake
One breath at a time
Into heaven’s heart, where
Moonlight sparkles
On vast, windless oceans
While silence sees.
© doshin mj nelson 2005
Somewhere
Between the calling, and the giving;
Between the fullness that
Flows through a hollow bone,
And the emptiness that lifts the feather;
Between longing for love and the
Breathing of the Beloved;
Somewhere beyond everything and nothing;
Lies the perfect balance of yin and yang.
There… the rattlesnake bites his tail,
And Now Awakens.
Before I served the
Beloved through suffering,
Now the Beloved serves
Those who suffer through me.
© doshin mj nelson
2003
The Wings of Angels
In the blossom of her youth
There was such beauty and grace,
But, God had a plan.
He needed someone to inspire the Angels.
He wanted someone strong
So, he gave her the strength of two men.
He needed someone educated and eloquent;
He led her to a teacher who changed her life.
He chose someone with the creative fire.
Painting, music, prose, and poetry
Flowed through her in many languages,
Like torrents rushing to the sea.
He needed someone compassionate.
With the bitter sting of prejudice,
He forged a heart and soul so pure.
That when he sent them, they adored her.
The Archangels were with her for months.
They whispered in the wind, flooded dark dreams with light,
And filled the silence with the flapping of wings;
Then late one afternoon, they came for her.
They called her to the hilltop, and took her home.
They picked this beautiful flower from the garden of life,
And as the sun set over the woods on the hill,
Her spirit bloomed like a rose, and inspired the heavens.
I love you Jo
Your brother Michael
© doshin mj nelson
2001
Caring for Dying
Beyond the shock
And shattering thoughts,
Beneath the anger
And raging storms,
There is a clearing—
Where tears fall gently in stillness
On a green and peaceful meadow,
And the stream runs clear and bold.
Here lies an opening—
Where a close brush with dying
Invites the awakening of joyful life.
I embrace compassion
And open my heart
To you in your pain.
I don’t have cancer.
I can’t know what you feel—
But I see something,
Glimmering behind your eyes.
In trying to give,
I have received so much.
For now I know
That one single day,
Awake and vibrant with wonder,
Is worth a hundred years
Of blindness sleeping.
© doshin mj nelson 2004
Roots of Fear
Be still and drop,
slip deep into silence
beyond images rising—
where darkness has eyes,
not teeth and claws.
In this stillness,
beneath the
thickened air where
fear cannot breathe
thoughts are born
and flow.
Smell the fear,
feel your thoughts,
rushing to meet it,
like drowning ghosts
desperately clinging
to a broken boat.
Open your heart
to stillness.
Feel, breathe,
stick your face
right into the
smelly dirt and
don’t turn away—
watch as though your
very life
depends on you
watching.
Watch until the
roots of fear
dissolve, and
sunlight steals the
darkness from
storming clouds.
Then sniff the fresh air
for the scent of flowers
blooming in the heart's
grateful ground.
© doshin mj nelson 2006
What is not
This morning I saw a deer
drinking from a stream.
She smelled me,
looked my way
and ran into the woods.
Right before her legs
began to move,
I saw a look, a
timeless presence, in those
deep, dark eyes.
I wonder what she saw,
where she went and where
she is right now?
Is she still thinking
of me, or has
Buddha nature
moved on
to feed
on greener grass?
The moment after
this “I” sees what is—
What is becomes what’s not:
The thinker caged in thought.
© doshin mj nelson 2006
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